“Ay algien para todos,” it’s what people in the Dominican Republic say when they see an unattractive or clearly crazy person. This translates to, “there is someone for everyone.” Yes, it is a backhanded compliment, because just like all negatives have a silver lining you must be realistic in knowing that unearned positives also have a dark lining. So, yes there is someone out there who will love this clearly unattractive/crazy person. However this person is clearly unattractive and/or crazy.

We must see the world for what it is and not believe all the contradictions that we make up for our fragile egos in the process of acceptance. We must accept ourselves for what we truly are. How can someone call themselves unique and at the same time have their life revolve around the idea of changing the way others view you? If you are trying so hard to change yourself then you do not believe that you are unique, you only think that you are different. Different is a defect. Defects are worthless. Unique is useful, unique is beautiful.

Whatever it is, you must own it. If you love your body, own it. Do what you want with it, however if you want to change your body exercise and eat healthy, don’t cheat yourself by eating junk food at all hours of the night and sneaking in diet pills. Work for what you want and you will earn it. Everything that is earned can never be taken away from you, because it is yours and yours alone.

It is this sense of shame and hiding that I find different in Americans than people whose parents or themselves are from another country. People in the western world have an idea that they should be happy with themselves so they overwork their minds and try to cheat their way into happiness by taking so many pills that next time a decision is made they won’t know whose making it anymore.

Newsflash! It is ok to not be happy with yourself. Unhappiness is your brain telling you that you, your life or a combination of both suck. Unhappiness is your brain telling you to look deep into yourself, do the work and change. Instead, in the American culture we shut our brains up with pills. Studies show that your brain can improve the chemicals in your body and the way it heals. Having chemical imbalance is not a problem; it is a side effect of your brain trying to tell you to change. Everything our brain feels is our body trying to speak to us the only way it knows how.

Please listen…. Before it stops talking.